Broken Seeds

Autumn Foerderer
1 min readAug 9, 2021
Mom and Me with a dog she borrowed from a passerby

I was sown from a lineage of broken seeds

into fertile but violated soil

I fear for my progeny that they too
may give birth to brokenness

I did not know how broken
nor how broken the seeds were from which I emerged

How come we cannot see ourselves clearly?

Why did I feel like a thriving plant?
when I have grief buried deep inside my cells

“Well, f*ck you too.”
Said the seed Sower over my iPhone.
As if I owed him something.

He is simply the Sower of the seed.

I rarely saw him.

My mother’s weeping watered my growth.

Alone in the house I grew.

Pulled up.

Replanted.

Again, and again. Crying. Crying. Crying.

Shredded roots.

I had one giant Oak Tree
holding my hand by the halcyon lake
He was felled.
too soon

I miss his strength.
And hearty laughter

I cry when I visit him and his Broken Tree.
now lovingly buried deep

I have grown tall.
With a Tree that also came from broken seeds

We are the carriers of brokenness.
Striving to heal

our lineage

Attempting to bear a harvest of healthy fruit

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Autumn Foerderer

Ramblings from a broken brain: stage IV brain cancer: giving up the life I planned, greeting the one waiting for me: thoughts, anxieties, hopes, dreams: LIFE.